Being Human is to struggle, when you hide that you, you hide yourself.

Over Christmas I had seen another bloggers website and was struck by her authenticity. I suddenly felt my own inability to be myself, I had to be that strong person I always feel that I must be. If I’m teaching and guiding others, I certainly can’t be seen to be ‘unhinged’ or not have it altogether. HOWEVER, in my heart I knew that it is not true. To be honest, I have always hidden the truth because I learnt very young that it was safer to be what people wanted me to be to make them feel comfortable. I’ve been aware of this dynamic and worked hard on letting go of the need to be something I’m not. In my journey of self-development I also realised that my so called faults or weakness indeed became my strength as it pulled me in ways that shaped my destiny. So this is where it gets interesting, when I started to focus on healing that part of myself, it showed up. It shows up to heal and to embrace ALL of me, to love all parts, the parts I don’t like and the parts I do like – sorry ‘love’.

Out at coffee a friend had shared that they felt I wasn’t authentic and that I was trying to be spiritual and yet wanted to be seen – I was conflicted about it. I remember watching her sharing this and thinking OMG this is like someone lifting up the lid and looking at me raw and naked. I listened gratefully, as she spoke – something resonated. I truly felt that if I wasn’t ready to hear these words I wouldn’t have been told them. What is being authentic? I never feel like I want to share challenges because it’s my stuff, not yours, not anyone’s and I don’t want to dump that on others or make the energy to be heavy either. There is was, I was shaping how I reveal myself to others. It doesn’t meant I have to be heavy, but it means that I now have to find a way to be true. Yes it’s about being truthful, being in the moment like this today, sharing my story, my truth.

The Video below (90 secs)  is to show you how I felt after being told I was not authentic and the thoughts that ran through my head. I’ve also recorded a Podcast above (10 mins)  about what it does to you when you hide your struggles and not name what is happening for you, whatever is going on. I’ve also put my Top 3 tips on how to use the struggle to make you stronger and healthier in your life. No hiding anymore, standing in the light is not as frighting as I thought it would be.

The Video below (90 secs) is to show you how I felt after being told I was not authentic and the thoughts that ran through my head. I’ve also recorded a Podcast above (10 mins) about what it does to you when you hide your struggles and not name what is happening for you, whatever is going on. I’ve also put my Top 3 tips on how to use the struggle to make you stronger and healthier in your life. No hiding anymore, standing in the light is not as frighting as I thought it would be.

My 3 top tips to manage struggles:

 

Name It.

Sometimes when we are going through shit (yes struggles), we get so caught up in keeping ourselves away from it, it becomes like a fuzzy distant thumping pain. When we stop and look at it and see what is REALLY going on it changes it. It’s like when you are angry and rather than pushing it down (which I call depression) you can stop and share WOW I’M SUPER ANGRY, even saying it out loud, it can move the energy and release it. This is the same, when you name it, you get to own it and take your power back. 

 

Ask What is the Learning or Message.

This is a tough place because most of time, you don’t get the learning until later HOWEVER, when you ask the question, it communicates to your mind and spirit that you are not a victim and you accept what is. This again let’s flow into your life to let things keep moving through.

 

Take Action to Nurture Your Needs.

When struggle appears, a lot of the time we beat ourselves up about it! Yes the struggle is our own self-critical voice that rides along with the actual ‘what is’. Take the action that will help you to FEEL BETTER, lift your vibration, whatever that is. Most of the time challenges arise to show us something, to make us MOVE something in our life. So take some action, no matter how big or small.

 

Remember if you are feeling super depressed or really struggling SPEAK TO A FRIEND. Of course there are great services you can also speak to (see below) but think of yourself as a friend too, what would you say to her or him? Be kind to yourself first.

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